It gets easier

When I first started blogging, I was terrified to be totally real.  I have never wanted to label myself by putting too much emphasis on my history, but the fact of the matter is, an eating disorder and body dysmorphia ruled my life for many years.  There are many things I missed out on, things I regret, and people I hurt along the way.  No, it’s not glamorous, but it’s the truth.  

When I finally exposed myself a little bit in this post, I felt a sense of relief.  I know the very act of mentioning the words eating- disorder is kind of faux pas but I don’t care anymore.  I think things have to change.  Eating disorders thrive on secrecy, self-hatred, isolation, and denial.  Going against these things is naturally, very frightening.

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What I have realized is that every time I own who I actually am and what I actually struggle with, I become a little more free from the destructive patterns of my past.   Pretending your issues don’t exist doesn’t make them disappear.  My intention isn’t to label myself but rather, to accept myself… all of myself.  By doing this, I can finally, fully be there for others.

Recently, I began asking strangers what they would tell someone who is struggling with body image and self confidence and they said beautiful, inspiring things. Sometimes I want to cry & hug them for being brave enough to tell me something real.

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My little project got me thinking… What would I tell someone struggling with body image, low self confidence, &/or an eating disorder??

Since this question hits so close to home, what wouldn’t I say??

For starters I would say this:

I know it is damn hard to love yourself and sometimes the only positive thing you can tell yourself, is that it’s ok that you couldn’t think of anything positive to tell yourself.

It get’s easier.  It’s ok if you don’t believe this. I didn’t either.  

Start being kind to yourself every single day. Even if it’s something totally silly or small. Practicing self-care in baby steps is better than not practicing it at all.

I would say that you are more beautiful and strong than you could ever imagine and that every moment you live feeling trapped in your own fear you are missing out on something.

Finally (for now) I would say,  you are worth it.

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What would you tell someone struggling with body acceptance, confidence issues or an eating disorder?

Is that someone you?

XO,

CS

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14 thoughts on “It gets easier

  1. Very powerful post – It takes a strong person to share and spread the love.

    I completely agree with your message of “it gets easier.” I have found that all aspects of life have generally gotten easier as I have grown and matured into the woman I now am. I think it is an important and universal message (in most cases).

    I think it is good to restore the faith we have in ourselfs. It will nurture a confidence that can help us battle our negative thoughts.

    1. You are so right Kelly. Growing up definitely helps us put our issues in perspective. Thanks for sharing your love of food and life with me. I don’t know what I would do without you. Love you!

  2. Awesome message Hali! Open your heart and love pours out! And remember all that love that you pour out comes back to you 10 fold. You are so blessed! I am so blessed! I would tell young girls that it TRULY IS WHAT’S INSIDE THAT COUNTS. Genetics give you your outside, but you develop you insides! Once people get to know the real you, the authentic, true you…..they don’t care anything about what you look like. Their heart sees your heart, and that’s what counts.

  3. All those years of conversations ribboning chocolate at Scharffen Berger and you never revealed your secret. It’s so illuminating to hear the truth come out now. It probably doesn’t help to tell you that every single person in the Ferry Bldg. thought you were beautiful. You have to think it yourself. Keep up the good work and hopefully your self-image will coincide with everyone around you.

    1. Taya, I hope you knew (and know) how much you inspire me! You are a such a strong woman and I always said that I wanted to grow up to be like you. Yes, we didn’t talk about my deeper issues, but our talks were beyond special to me. Boy, do I miss it!!

  4. Thank you Hali for this amazing post! LIVING truthfully will inspire so many countless people.. Your words are so important to hear ESPECIALLY in the yoga, running, health conscious communities! May we all be free from the different chains that bind us!

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